How to talk to pregnant friends (and relatives): Part 3 of an occasional series

So, I just found out that one of my cousins is pregnant. She’s 30 years old, healthy, normal weight. Nine months ago, she had an early miscarriage (5-6 weeks or so) which was allowed to resolve naturally, and now for this pregnancy, she’s seen her OB twice already (she’s now 7 weeks along).

At her most recent visit the OB took blood “to see if [she's] high-risk.”

Sigh.

What does one say in a situation like this? I’m the older cousin, and I’ve always been a bit of an obnoxious know-it-all to her (about, you know, all the things older cousins/sisters get to be–everything from school to boys on up), so I’m concerned that anything I say will sound that way again. . . on the other hand, I’m really concerned about my cousin! One previous miscarriage at six weeks DOES NOT make you “high-risk”–if this assessment is representative of the care she’s getting from her OB, then she’s going to have quite the unsafe, unsatisfying, intervention-filled birth.

–Christina

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