Missing your midwife

30 July 2009 at 10:29 am Leave a comment

My son is now eleven months and one week old. Whenever I think about a year ago at this time, it’s very hard to remember what life was like then. Our house was bigger, less full, less busy, less noisy, and there wasn’t this friendly adventurous creature climbing all over it. How can that be? I feel like he’s always been a part of my life.

The other strange thing about thinking back to a year ago is realizing that we were seeing our midwife every week at that point. Every Saturday or Sunday she’d come to the house, chat at the dining room table, ask me to weigh myself and do a urine strip-test, then palpate my belly, measure it, and let us hear the baby’s heartbeat.

Last October–after it had already been a few weeks since Kelly had come for my final six week post-partum appointment–my husband observed that he missed her, and that it “felt weird” not to be seeing her every week. From what I hear, this is a very common reaction for people to have after the birth–and it’s natural, too, because a midwife integrates herself into your lives, so that you are having your baby (in the ideal homebirth) on your turf and your terms. The midwife is not there to take over, but to assist, and by the time of the birth she’s come to know you pretty well.

So, do people ever say they miss their doctors? I guess it’s technically possible, but it’s not really the kind of thing you’d expect to hear–it’s just not at all the same kind of relationship.



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Update on MA Midwifery Bill–Hearing report Ina Mae’s talk postponed

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